Wednesday, October 17, 2007
Second verse, same as the first
Its amazing how this pregnancy has been a carbon copy of my last. Early contractions and bedrest and drugs - check. Off the ibuprofen and contractions ramp up - check. The waiting at the end and uncertainty - check, check. But I must say, it is much easier going through it knowing that the chances of success at this point are extremely high. (And have I said recently how much I love the drugs?)
I missed Monday's Day of Remembrance. It doesn't mean I don't remember the four that came before; the four that would have been our much loved children. It's clear I don't do this pregnancy thing well. In the depths of hormones, I storm about this fact. That I can't rely on my ability to be reliable; to make it through a day without crashing. But bottom-line, I'm lucky enough to do it well enough.
My miscarriages were officially unexplained after the biggest boatload of testing they could come up with (and the drugs that were supposed to help with "egg quality.") How did I get lucky enough that my, clearly, seriously irritable uterus calmed down for Bacon and this little one to stay in and grow? No idea. But I'm so happy that they did.
I missed Monday's Day of Remembrance. It doesn't mean I don't remember the four that came before; the four that would have been our much loved children. It's clear I don't do this pregnancy thing well. In the depths of hormones, I storm about this fact. That I can't rely on my ability to be reliable; to make it through a day without crashing. But bottom-line, I'm lucky enough to do it well enough.
My miscarriages were officially unexplained after the biggest boatload of testing they could come up with (and the drugs that were supposed to help with "egg quality.") How did I get lucky enough that my, clearly, seriously irritable uterus calmed down for Bacon and this little one to stay in and grow? No idea. But I'm so happy that they did.
